Job Request Please Help

~~Nik00117~~ · 07-15-2007, 12:43 PM

Was looking for advice to ad to this letter which i'm sending into a computer company requesting a job postion.

Quote:

Hello, first allow me to introduce myself. I am a Military dependent who is currently living in Germany, KMC military area. My name is Niklas Knipschild, and I’m A+ certified and working towards my CCNA at this moment. I saw your ad in the stars and stripes and was interested in it, all be it for a different reason then most. I was looking for employment as a PC technician.

My qualifications are as follows, again I am A+ certified in both Hardware and Operating system. I spent several months as a intern at a computer shop last summer repairing PCs and learning troubleshooting as well as communicating to costumers about computers. I am also a computer enthusiast always on the know of the latest technology. Not only this, but I speak German near fluently, my mother is German and has raised me to speak it as well as English. I own my own car and I know the area fairly well.

The reason why I am taking the time to write you this e-mail is because I understand that your ad in the stars and stripes must mean that your company ships computers to my area the KMC military district. Therefore we all know computers break down, and need to be repaired and having someone local which is qualified to repair them who works for you is only good business sense. There fore I’m requesting a job position at your company as a Computer technician.

Any advice including grammar or content is welcomed.

**Spatcher** · 07-15-2007, 06:59 PM

Therefore is one word and is usually followed by a comma.

briealeida · 07-18-2007, 08:11 AM

I would capitalize 'Stars' and 'Stripes'.

"all be it" should be 'albeit' http://www.m-w.com/dictionary/albeit

Customers is spelled wrong.

Don't capitalize 'computer', 'hardware' or 'operating'.

07-15-2007, 06:59 PM	#2 (permalink)
Spatcher Henry Join Date: Apr 2005 Posts: 3,484 OS: Mac OSX	Re: Job Request Please Help Therefore is one word and is usually followed by a comma. __________________ JohnThePilot: Cenedl heb iaith, cenedl heb galon (a nation without a language is a nation without a heart) John Butler Trio: Go take a step outside, see what's shakin' in the real world - Good Excuse Paul Kelly: Just add a dollop of tomato sauce for sweetness and that extra tang - How to Make Gravy

07-18-2007, 08:11 AM	#3 (permalink)
briealeida Registered User Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: slippery rock, pa Posts: 17 OS: Ubuntu, Kubuntu, Slackware	Re: Job Request Please Help I would capitalize 'Stars' and 'Stripes'. "all be it" should be 'albeit' http://www.m-w.com/dictionary/albeit Customers is spelled wrong. Don't capitalize 'computer', 'hardware' or 'operating'.